OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Nov 23, 2020 6:21 pm

I got R. J. K.'s autograph on my copy when he was on his book tour.

Heinrich mentioned another one that might be interesting. "Game Rules" edition VII.
GameRules.jpg
Mulster Backgrove gathered much of the procedure garnishments.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Nov 24, 2020 12:10 am

R.J.K. Bowling's half-wit brother Raoul "Jimmy" Kimperschmidtenheimer penned a half-
-price knock-off book series, the Volume 1 being titled "Hairy Popper and the Festering
Boil". The series was hugely popular with both the Pythagorians and the Escaladians, as
both groups were notoriously price conscious.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:19 pm

We were talking about "Jimmy" the other night at the lodge meeting. He always wore that floppy ushanka.

One of the members was surprised to learn that it was Kalamity Dick who created the first cellular telephone.
CellFone.jpg
Dick was able to communicate with the Mount Stinkmore Station without the magnetic static on the main line. Malleable fiber bindings made the use of prismatic wax possible. Note the Van Cleif terminals.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Nov 24, 2020 2:26 pm

The KD celfone is a story of amazing engineering and the treachery that can
be business. Beyond performing flawlessly as a telephone, the device also acted
as a reversible heating/cooling radiator, AND place to tuck one's pencils. Spada-
-fora Industries, Inc. lobbied the Calhoun County Council to ban it's use, and through
undocumented widespread voter fraud and payoffs, kept KD's miracle machine
from ever reaching the market. Such a shame. The pocket-size version was quite
a seat warmer.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Tue Nov 24, 2020 6:24 pm

Small detail compared to the marvelous complexity of KD's engineering triumph, but the photograph beautifully displays wallpaper designed by Florabelle McGeachen, world-renowned decorative artitiste and Tri-burg native. It's rumored she and KD had a "thing" for each other, but their interactions were so discreetly conducted none could say how deeply involved they may have been. Suffice to say, after Florabelle lost her life in that tragic flour paste accident, KD never again chose to hang a wallpaper pattern she had not designed.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Nov 24, 2020 9:44 pm

Heinrich states that KD did the mechanical engineering for Florabelle's steam
powered wallpaper. With two drive pistons and six drive wheels, tractive effort
was quadrupled. Samples used in the K Adit of the Alphabet Mine are on display
in the Special Collections wing.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Wed Nov 25, 2020 1:03 pm

Tut tut looks like rain.
creeks out.JPG
This was taken the day that KD ran his experimental rain making machine. Due to the uncertainties of the out come he put this on the back burner for a while. I think I heard he did get it out once more during the thirties to try to over come the "Dust Bowl" , but I never heard how that turned out.

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Wed Nov 25, 2020 1:10 pm

In this case KD's genius was inspired by a miscalculation stemming for the osmatic precipitation from the tinker sprang purchased from an outside source.
WallPr.jpg
Rather than being appalled by the destruction to the wall and it's covering he could see the potential for Florabelle's new vision. After a dinner of Filet of Mesocricetus the two gentlemen perused the possibilities of combining condensation with fibro skermology.
The rain maker was simply a natural evolution of working the devise with 3 drive wheels rather than six.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Nov 26, 2020 2:52 pm

While the reduction of drive wheels may have resulted in the success of the rainmaker,
an unforeseen side effect was the 3 unused wheels attracted the attention of unsavory
characters like Al Cologne out of the Big Windy. Soon drugs were being openly sold on
street corners in all the towns of population across Calhoun County. This surveillance
photo, taken by Detective Frank Short, catches Al crossing the street from one of these
illicit operations in the summer of 1938.

KDAlCologne.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Thu Nov 26, 2020 10:06 pm

Interestingly, Kalamity Dick and Al Cologne became good friends in that they both enjoyed playing parcheesi.
parcheesi.jpg
Al sometimes cheated but KD introduced some physics which balanced things out. Dick also helped Al with some equipment problems back at the old hideout. When Al couldn't get together with Dick they would phone each other the moves on the C-phones although sometimes it was hard to hear.
I SAID "HARD TO HEAR!"
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Nov 27, 2020 1:30 am

Yes, the two overlooked the other's proclivities and built a long friendship
on Parcheesi. The two of them formed the Horrible Little Man Club, as a fun
poke at newspaper headlines that surrounded Al. It was at the hideout where
they conjured up this club, and the partnership with the Uvula League, to form
the Tri-Burg Parcheesi Guild, which remains the ruling body and authority on all
regional Parcheesi events, including the Gold Cup finals.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Nov 27, 2020 2:47 pm

Getting the Uvula League involved and forming a Guild did make for exciting and widespread fun. Al pretty much behaved himself and only rubbed out a few lucky finalists. He also was stopped frequently on his way to the violin lessons.
Guildd.jpg
It was never really as satisfying as the quiet matches in the back room at the speakeasy with just the two opponents nibbling on their hominy crisps.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Nov 27, 2020 10:34 pm

Doubling back to KD's rainmaker, Heinrich brought this photo by to share.
He states that KD and Al are seen here, behind the Parcheesi Guild's testing
facility, after Kalamity Dick mistakenly left the rainmaker running, as the
two were deeply engaged in a Parcheesi match. Al informed KD that he
needed to go settle some business at the Drug Store, and Kalamity pulled
a cigar dory from the Uvula League's storage area to make the run. The
cigar dory race became an event of the Chugwater Regatta the following year,
and has been a staple ever since.

KDrainmaker1.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sat Nov 28, 2020 12:16 pm

Dick and Cuthbert had, in fact, discussed the possibility of the precipitaxinator over generating a couple days previous.
Rrrainn.jpg
The idea of a gyro-drizzle check valve with helical zappinoids infused seemed promising.
But it turned out to be water under the bilge by the Friday match.
Al's use of the dory is thought to be the rationale for his nickname "Cigarface".
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sat Nov 28, 2020 2:37 pm

It's possible Cuthbert was responsible for not shutting down the precipitaxinator before the gyro drizzle check valve was installed. Enthusiastic over the fact the precipitaxinator had ended a four-year drought on his ranch, the massive flooding down Chugwater's main street was the result. Ernie didn't mind. He had purchased a mis-directed boxcar load of Venetian gondolas a few years back, and could sense an opportunity when he saw one. His saloon was on high ground right at the water line anyway. The flood quickly receded when Dick finally pulled the plug on the precipitaxinator. Cuthbert was eventually forced into dry-farming.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sat Nov 28, 2020 3:37 pm

Cuthbert got blamed for many things. Ernie was much luckier than the folks at the Terminal Café.
Terminall.jpg
Much of the daily special, "Turkey Faced Sandwich" was diluted past the point of ingestion by out of towners. At one point the trolley floated down past Jasper's Cheese Sculpting and turned on it's side. Millie Smacklebukle might have drown if not for Skippy Spadaford lassoing her from the porch.
The fact that the moss yield for the season was up 33% took the wind out of the lawsuits.
Happy Day of Albalonians to those at the Helix Mill.
Rich
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sat Nov 28, 2020 4:27 pm

The flood nearly ended the Terminal Cafe. Situated at the bottom of Water Street, it was over two months before the flood receded entirely, and another six weeks before the mud dried out. The continued damp caused all of the cafe's bread products to grow mold almost as soon as they were delivered. Cafe owner Roscoe Spoindrip made the best of it by promoting flexible soda crackers and free refills on water, but patrons began to shun the watery soups and the mainstay turkey faced sandwiches. Roscoe's head cook saved the business by offering watercress sandwiches and moss tea. The Terminal Cafe never completely dried out until 1919 and passage of the Volsted Act. The business began to thrive when the Albalonians (tee-totallers all) adopted the Terminal as their regular weekly meeting place.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sat Nov 28, 2020 9:53 pm

You failed to mention Roscoe's head cook conjuring up "mud pie" for a menu
item, as another of the things that saved the business. It began as a joke, during
the flood cleanup, that people would buy the muck they were slopping out.
Ferndip Watson, the head cook, put it in a pie pan and the rest is history. The
demand was so great that Roscoe built the sludge pond that is still in use today
to catch the famous Chugwater sediment for making pies.

KDmudpie1.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sat Nov 28, 2020 10:58 pm

When the sludge pond froze over, the mud pies also made excellent hockey pucks. Many a spirited game was played on the ice behind the Terminal Cafe. Ferndip was a formidable goalie who could have easily gone professional, but the Terminal Cafe waa his whole world.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Nov 29, 2020 2:07 am

I have never seen the sludge pond freeze over. The bacteria and enzymes
keep it much warmer than the ambiant temperature. The hockey pucks were
actually coagulated blood in the enzyme mix. Something Kalamity Dick came
upon by accident when working out the math on precipitaxinator/gyro drizzle
check valve details. The blood pucks were endorsed as superior by both the
Uvula League and the Parcheesi Guild.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sun Nov 29, 2020 5:20 pm

The Mud Pie Split was a favorite at the Terminal Café when the soggy sandwiches lost favor. Warmth from the bacteria and enzymes was tempered by weasel adrenalin and creamed ether sprinkles.
Desert.jpg
As far as I've heard the gyro drizzle had little to do with it.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Sun Nov 29, 2020 6:34 pm

Ether sprinkles. I thought that was a name of a clown at the County Fair.


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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Nov 29, 2020 7:16 pm

Ether Sprinkles took his stage name from the namesake Terminal Cafe
dessert. Ether toured with Annie Oakleaf for many years. The County
Fair thing was just a side gig. One cannot overestimate just how big of
a deal the dessert menu was to saving the Terminal Cafe and its continued
success. From Monkberry Moon Delight to Mud Pie, it is the dessert menu
that made the Terminal Cafe famous, the world over.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Nov 30, 2020 1:14 pm

Thanks for bringing it up Herb. Sprinkles had traveled with the Midway Monogynies to County Fairs throughout middle America until playing at the Tri-Berg Fair. Falling in love with the pungent moss air and friendly inhabitants of the valley he resolved to make it his home.
Sprinklez.jpg
He made a little money entertaining at Birthdays and at half time at the planetarium. It became necessary for him to sign on at the Helix Mill as a flounder until Annie Oakleaf offered to make him head target in the Bungalo Biff Wild West extravaganzas. You may remember Tallene Knudsen was also a star in the westerly spectacle. Also brother Hooey.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Tue Dec 01, 2020 11:39 am

Indeed, Sprinkles enjoyed a satisfying career with the wild west show. He fell hard in love with Tallene, but she figured he was just clowning around, and anyway, she was romantically involved with one of the troupe extras name of Biffalo Buff. Not so much for his personality as for the fact that he was actually an inch taller than Tallene; not perceptible when she had her boots on with the 3" heels, but it mattered to Tallene.

Sprinkles, whose name was actually Schufeld, became fed up with the stage name "Sprinkles" after years of performing, and upon retirement greatly looked forward to being addressed by his given Christian name. Alas, it was not to be, owing to a bad prostate. Cest la vie, as they say in Quebec.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Tue Dec 01, 2020 5:04 pm

In the '50s Halverstam's drug store was believed to be haunted. Folks that happened to be in the store late at night could hear the ghost of Ether Schufeld juggling while singing "Dancing with Tears in My Eyes". It was haunting and mournful and brought tears to the eyes.
In addition, KD and Cuthbert could be heard reciting Algebrake equations to each other.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Dec 01, 2020 8:54 pm

It seems we have a minor mix up here. Ether Sprinkles given name was
actually Schufeld Sprinkles, not the other way around. The Sprinkles Ranch
on the north slopes of Mount Stinkmore are direct relations.

Heinrich relates documents are in the archive showing it was proven, using
algebrake equations, that Halverstram's was indeed haunted.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Wed Dec 02, 2020 11:20 am

Good point, Burger. Sebastian just sent a photostat of Sprinkles' birth certificate up the vacuum port from the Institute's sub-basement. As previously stated, "Ether Sprinkles" was the stage name of the clown who was born Schufeld Schufeld. His parents were terribly unimaginative when it came to naming children and pets. Scufeld's sister as well as their dog and cat were also named Schufeld. Any road, Schufeld adopted the name Ether Sprinkles after the Terminal Cafe's signature dessert topping. Confusion over this detail is most understandable. Thank you, Sebastian, and by the way, please program the vacuum port to take care of that pile of cigar ash in the north entry portico.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Wed Dec 02, 2020 11:31 am

It made no difference to him. Schufeld or Sprinkles they could call him ether one. The Ranch did in fact start out on the North slope but with the over utilization of the precipitaxinator it ended up in the Aroma valley.
Checking Heinrich's documents proved exceedingly frightening. A number of Pythagoreans disappeared after ingurgitating midnight Dreamland Sundaes.
Beware the crushed pineapple.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Wed Dec 02, 2020 1:30 pm

Back to the haunting of Halverstam's Drug Store, it's particularly eerie that one of the manifestations of paranormal activity is the voices of KD and Cuthbert discussing algebrake equations. It has only recently come to light (again through painstaking and meticulous research of materials dredged from the trunk of values) that the lengthy discussions the two friends had over a period of years resulted in the only unsuccessful invention KD ever created : "Algae Brakes". Noting the extreme toughness of an odd strain of spyrogyra that grew along the southern rim of Moss Slough #13, KD fabricated band linings for the raceabout composed of woven moss impregnated with algae. His hope was to produce a longer-lasting lining that could be manufactured more econimically than the "Norwegian" band lining that was in almost universal use at the time. Alas, the "Algae-brake" linings generated a tremendous amount of heat in friction which cracked all the transmission drums in the raceabout. Dick was extremely embarrassed by the turn if events, especially when a number of backyard mechanics cast aspersions on his driving technique, claiming no one who had installed an experimental set (provided gratis by KD) had any trouble with the product. It was about this time KD and Cuthbert left the Basin for the Veedawoo for an extended period. The debacle was soon forgotten ; Dick buried all reference to Algae Brakes in the trunk of values. And Bob's your uncle !
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Wed Dec 02, 2020 9:08 pm

True story ! Bob is my uncle, and a Coroner in his professional life. As young teens, he
gave us kids a "tour" of a woman's chest cavity to show us what happens internally when
you smoke. What we saw was unsuitable for growing moss or dessert toppings. I decided
to quit before I ever began. Something they do a lot of in the Chugwater Basin.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Thu Dec 03, 2020 12:41 pm

All was not lost in the Algae Brake endeavor. Slim Halverstam found the spyrogyra cooked just right in the transmission. Using Sacha Inchi oil in the crankcase gave it a slightly nutty taste.
AlgBurgr.jpg
Algae-Sacha burger saved his lunch business from the Turkey Faced debacle. For a time they had to run 2 trolley's down Ratchet Ave.
Even Bob and his Uncle patronized the counter thought they did wear their plush Bunny hats.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Dec 03, 2020 4:27 pm

Algae-Sacha Burger was my Mother's side sister's Uncle Bob. Uncle Bob discovered
the rich deposits of spyrogyra above the Silver Plume rapids, that led to the industry
still there to this day. The plush bunny hats were always popular.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Fri Dec 04, 2020 1:48 pm

It's true the Algae-Sacha burger saved the Terminal Cafe, but as a loss-lead menu item. In Spite of its gargantuan size, it sold for a paltry two-bits like any other burger of the era. Brought home in a take-out bag, one Algae-Sacha burger could feed a family of four for a week, which made it very popular during the Great Supression. Its popularity brought customers thronging to the Terminal Cafe, and the volume on other offerings saved the day, although it cost the cafe $1.0680 @ to produce. Marketing management is indeed a mysterious discipline.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Dec 06, 2020 8:37 pm

Woulda, shoulda, coulda .... Uncle Lumby and Algae-Sacha Burger stumbled
into the invention of the pogo stick after Uncle Bob discovered the spyrogyra
deposits above the Silver Plume rapids. It was purely by accident, which was
par for the course, but the two worked on it over the winter, until the ground
pounding began to shake things loose inside the Alphabet Mine. It was the
Christmas season and things were already tense in Tri-Burg houses, as family
members argued over what is the worst Christmas song of all time. No photos
of the fighting have ever surfaced.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Sun Dec 06, 2020 11:21 pm

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Dec 07, 2020 12:07 pm

With no footnote accompanying this photo I can only assume it is Ernie calming Rutherford Spadaford after a disagreement on his tab or Grover Cleveland campaigning for bottle custodian. If it were the Bob and his Uncle just clowning around we would of coarse see the plush Bunny hats.
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Definitely a decanter of Happy Sally in hand.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Mon Dec 07, 2020 3:30 pm

I'm reasonably sure that's Ernie and Rutherford Spadaford engaged in gentlemanly discussion. It's amusing how enduring political affiliations can become. Obviously, Rutherford was named after President Hayes, while back in the day, Ernie had been a staunch supporter of Samuel Tilden. While Rutherford's lax attitude toward his bar tab was an obvious cause of regular disagreements between the two, there was always an element of political frission in their discussions. As ever, the decanter of Happy Sally was the final arbiter. As a result, Rutherford was a perennial object of extreme interest to Basin phrenologists, owing to the number and quality of lumps on his skull.

Those interested in further research will be gratified to know that a complete set of radiographs of Rutherford's head can be viewed in the Institute's Solipsistic Wing, filed under "S".
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Dec 07, 2020 7:08 pm

Rutherford was certainly a patron of the Vend-O-Matics at their various locations throughout the region. Catered by the Terminal Café, they kept many nourished that could not catch the trolley.
VendOMatic.jpg
Although not invented by Kalamity Dick, they were perfected and often serviced by the local thaumaturgist. Sadly, the Algae-Sacha beef cake would not fit in the machine whole.
Note: lumps on the skull can be inconspicuous under the bunny hat.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Dec 08, 2020 1:35 am

Harry Organs used the name "Bellowfonté" when he worked as a tallyman. His
interest in the number and quality of the lumps made him an expert in his field.
Heinrich reports that Bellowfonté's complete set of records on both the number
AND quality of the lumps is also kept in the Institute's Solipsistic Wing, only these
are filed under "S-12a". A special reminder to readers that due to the current
situation, one must wear a wig.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Wed Dec 09, 2020 12:00 pm

You say the Solipsistic Wing? I will wait til the 22nd to go look it up then. I have written S-12a on my palm in dykem and will be careful washing until then.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Wed Dec 09, 2020 7:21 pm

An excellent plan.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Wed Dec 09, 2020 7:53 pm

An excellent plan. The moon will be 59.6% full, and waxing. For reasons the research staff has been unable to learn, for some reason the Solipsistic wing produces its own interior weather; it always rains in there during the dark if the moon. Point of interest, periodically, Kalamity Dick would polish his raceabout with a product called "Moon Wax". It has not been available for many decades.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Wed Dec 09, 2020 9:54 pm

Duke Fitzellwitz wrote 'Wax, by the light of the moon" after seeing Kalamity
Dick polishing on the speedster there in the moonlight. One still hears it from
time-to-time. It is currently being used (in part) in a radio ad for Enid's Chocolate
Carbunkles. I hear they are available in both French and English.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Dec 11, 2020 12:13 pm

An early shot of the Old Curiosity Shop. Enid's Chocolate Carbunkles began operations
in the back portion in 1902 and by 1921 had taken over the entire block, with the exception
of the Curiosity Shop and the Uvula League's 3rd Quarter office. The carbunkle business
was always kept "on the down low", on account of the mushroom moss trade being such a
dominant player in the local economy. Heinrich says that he can locate no photos showing
signage for Enid's. The Curiosity Shop was kept operational as a front, to give the curious
something to look at, while distracting from the goings-on in back. Enid kept the Uvula
League in fresh carbunkles as a way of "greasing the wheels". No serious issues were ever
reported. Festoon Wimberly's natty runabout is seen parked at streetside. Festoon credited
his carbunkle consumption for curing his having two left feet, allowing him to excell as a
triangle player, for which he was best known. He toured with the Tri-Burg Philharmonic
Orchestra until the Dancer's Union forced him to pay dues. He felt this unfair representation,
and after taking his case all the way to the Chugwater Supreme Court, went back to making
carbunkles full time and fielding questions in the Curiosity Shop.

carbunkle1.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Dec 11, 2020 2:04 pm

The Carbunkle dipperation tanks and chairs for the sorters can be seen lower left in the photo. This would have been done outdoors before the addition of the quarters were finished in the back. Kalamity Dick's Nephew Hennessey motioned a ride he had in the natty runabout with Wimberly. He had slipped on the freshly "Moon" waxed running board and bent his nose a bit. A stop for frosted cream was make to sooth the bump.
The rest of the trip is not necessary to mention here.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Fri Dec 11, 2020 2:16 pm

Au contraire Rich, please elaborate on the rest of the trip. The accounts of time gone by are what keeps this thread interesting!

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Dec 11, 2020 3:55 pm

OK. Well, according to his diary they stopped at Binford's to pick up a spare Ox-shoe and a pint of liquid vanadium. Retuning to the Ford it would not start. Checking the usual trouble spots gave no solution so they tried to push it to the service depot. After a block and a half it came to life. Festoon claimed he never did discover the reason for the fault. About then Hennessey thought he saw Clairvortilete Pinkernuckle come out of the dress shop. It turned out not to be her but as she had borrowed his gewgaw it would have been an opportunity to remind her to return it. Then a stop at the Helix Mill for a six pack of rewinds. Always good to have spares. It seemed prudent to fill the fuel tank so they stopped at the Pure Oil and had Oscar flush a couple liters in. Oscar's sister Opaline had fractured her Uvula previously and they had to hear the latest of that ordeal. They took a quick spin by the marina to see if the fleet had dropped of any shamble vaulting vests but no such luck. After the frosted cream it was back to the Curiosity Shop as Festoon had to clock in the enamel bibelots.
You may see why I didn't elaborate earlier as none of it was of much consequence except for mistaking the girl for Clairvortilete.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Fri Dec 11, 2020 9:35 pm

Interesting non the less.


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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Dec 11, 2020 9:47 pm

Binford supplied the spaking rods for the carbunkles. With six per row
and 450 per barrel, that's a lot of spaking rods. A big reason Enid began
and kept the carbunkle business in Chugwater was the ready supply of
spaking rods, as they were a waste product at the Alphabet Mine, and
were made available at very good rates to Enid. Festoon handled delivery
when rail delivery was not possible, due to ramped-up production schedules.
It really was a good working situation for everyone involved, and that included
Indians too.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sat Dec 12, 2020 3:59 pm

Kalamity Dick rarely had interpersonal difficulties with anyone, which is amazing considering his vast impact on all aspects of Basin industry in those early years. Binford was the sole exception. His conflict with KD centered on the downturn in his business owing to a decrease in salvage sparking rods at the alphabet mine.

Noting how rapidly the sparking rods were used past efficiency, KD re-engineered the sparking rods on the kaphistulator model and specified a bronze-vanadium alloy that tripled the using life. His patent was taken up by Saez-Roebust, a Silver Plume foundry concern. The Alphabet mine immediately requisitioned all their sparking rods from them with the result Binford's application suffered a 66% reduction of operations and commensurate income, which made him very bitter toward KD. So bitter, in fact, he refused a convivial flagon of Happy Sally when Dick offered to buy drinks for the house. A shame, because he certainly could have profited by an adjustment of his bad attitude.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sat Dec 12, 2020 4:05 pm

Spaking rods were crucial to KD's Magnificor experiment. Some claim it was the first demonstration of Solar power.
Magnificor.jpg
The boys from the mill were able to unravel as many as 2 dozen cords an hour. Hamilton Wimberly, no relation, was foreman of this crew. He's the spunky one leaning on the flingfork.
Much ado was made from fears of draining the sun of it's energy to causing various health disorders. Not wanting to battle the detractors in court KD moved on to guilderfluke refinements and left the Magnificor on the back burner so to speak.
Varnly Withletone had just moon waxed the collectors for this photo. Can you tell the difference?
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sat Dec 12, 2020 8:52 pm

What are these "sparking rods" of which you speak, Rich ?

The spaking process involves no spark. Rather, it involves the electrophysical
agitation, to meltrositate the carbunkling while immersed in the tepid pools.
Kalamity Dick worked directly with Enid and Festoon on the meltrositation theory
and pool design. Large supplies of recycled tepid made the circulation troughs
sparkly clean, even with the spaking rods working at 45% efficiency. Most times
they worked at near 100%, but during times of nutmeg unavailability (another story
unto itself) they lowered the agitation levels to save funicular adhesion at the
traction points. This whole process also included Indians too. In the main, the
Indians were fond of the off-gassing aroma and amused by the bubbles.

Great photo, Rich. Always a joy to see reference to the magnificor. What a
beautiful machine.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sun Dec 13, 2020 6:09 pm

In the interest of historical backgrounds, it's worth mentioning that Kalamity Dick's inventive genius was a trait that ran strong in the Klamitboffer family. For example, Dick's uncle Columbus Hercules Klamitboffer (aka Uncle Lumby) left his home town in Westconsin for Wyoming in the 1860's. Records show he is the originator of the self-contained travelling home which he dubbed the "Lumbago", a name he coined by combining his nickname with the suffix syllable of his village of origin.

While the name faded from common parlance, the ingenious self-contained mobile domicile he fashioned became popular with Basin sheepherders, and eventually with sheep outfits throughout the mountain west. No longer pulled by horses, the "sheep camp" is still in use on the range. Time to give full credit to Uncle Lumby and his inventive genius. Photo shows Lumby and the first "Lumbago" shortly after his arrival in Saddle String.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Dec 13, 2020 6:54 pm

Doctor Freutzellhoeffer said that part of Uncle Lumby's inventive prowess
was due to having 12 teeth on the right side of his mouth and 18 on the other.
From an early edition of Creative Genius, Skunk Removal, and Metallurgy magazine.
The one with the cover story about the Nutmeg Incident.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Dec 14, 2020 1:38 pm

One thing I would like to make clear regarding the Nutmeg Incident is that Farley was nowhere near the veranda until well after mid afternoon. Suspicions of garam masala being in the box next to the rostrum were not substantiated even after the detonation. The delegation scrutinizing both the incident and the repercussions agreed several amalgamations may or may not have actually been applied.
My apology to the editor for sounding supercilious but I have received a number of comments.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Mon Dec 14, 2020 10:35 pm

One thing I always admired about Kalamity Dick was his well thought
out receiver and the whole process for the receiving of the comments.
This tradition is so taken for granted today, but before KD came along,
it was incredibly labor intensive and physically awkward. The adjustable
handle and reverse gear were game changers, and the ice flanger made
winter operations possible, even in the higher elevations. The Receiving
of the Comments is such a wonderful holiday tradition.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Tue Dec 15, 2020 10:41 am

A good percentage of those comments came through the antenna at the Mount Stinkmore station. Some of course, were allegations pertaining to the Nutmeg Incident and Dick wrestled with those alligators. The reverse gear was wound counterclockwise to accommodate the previously acknowledged transwongulator. This made spiffing less cumbersome.
How fitting to remember at this festive season of the year.
Heinrich promised photos of the rostrum by Festivus.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Dec 15, 2020 3:01 pm

To "wrestle with those alligators", Dick built bins to sort the comments. If
you go to the alley behind the Vestibule Factory, you can still see them there,
marked "HINTS", "LIES", "ALLEGATIONS", "INNUENDO", and "FACTS". They remain
as part of the Bronsworth Collection, with maintenance and funding coming
from the Stinkmore Academy and historical oversight from Heinrich, himself.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:48 pm

Kalamity Dick was fond of word play. It's no surprise "alligator wrestling" was a triple entender for him. First, was the literal fact ; the Tri-burg Moss Improvement Board had hired him to remove a pair of alligators from the upper terrace pond. No one was sure where the reptiles had come from, but their presence severely hampered the moss harvest. KD fashioned a clever device much like an oversized mousetrap which enabled him to handle the muscular beasts with little effort. Second, the alligator/allegations bin referred to in the orevious post. Third, and perhaps most interesting, were the billiard games he played with a dog named Gator, who used to run the tables in the back room of Ernie's Saloon. (See photo below). The pup was a natural, and a real challenge for KD, as Gator would win more than half of the time. So, there you have it.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Dec 17, 2020 1:42 am

Gator was one of a trio of pups birthed by Ernie's bitch Beulah. The three pups
were named by Grunda Fulpants, Gator, Gooter, and Goiter. All three were naturals
at the billiard tables.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Thu Dec 17, 2020 9:00 am

3-ball and blind-mans-bluff tournaments on Tuesdays brought in patrons that otherwise would have gone to the Loop Saloon in Blattsville. Extra Pickled Eggs were brought in and the dogs were even featured in Ripley's "Prove it or Not".(Not the November issue, the other one.) Melvis Shinderwickle often refereed when he was conscious.
Gooter suffered from a vowel deficiency but played all the harder for it.
7-ball in the corner pocket.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by perry kete » Thu Dec 17, 2020 9:32 am

Wasn't Melvis Shinderwickle the fellow that was in the "Witless" protection program after flunking the third grade when he was 16?
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Thu Dec 17, 2020 12:45 pm

Yes, thanks for acknowledging that, Perry. Not only was he part of the program but he had designed the cover and the preamble outline. His sister Helvis had taught Goiter, the more average of the three, to fetch wrist pins and spindle bolts. Quite uncommon for those years.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Thu Dec 17, 2020 9:14 pm

Curiously, the "witless protection program" evolved from another less-known organizational construct known as the "Windlass Protection Assn." As usual, Kalamity Dick figured large in the narrative. When development of the alpahbet mines progressed to the excavation of stopes and vertical shafts following richer veins of T's and E's (always in highest demand) Windlasses were employed to lower the miners to the newer galleries. Unfortunately the first mechanisms were of an undependable sort, and occasionally a cage full of miners would be dropped a few hundred feet, ending by "yo-yo-ing" at the end of the cable. Though no lives were lost, it was a singularly unpleasant experience. This resulted in a backlash of sabotage by the miners, who destroyed several of the mine's windlass headstocks in protest. The mine management countered by forming the Windlass Protection Assn. KD solved the problem with a transverse reciprocating demi-ratchet which made the lift systems fool proof. The subversive organization swiftly cganged their ficus to assist the "witless" and peace and happiness once more reigned in the Tri-burgs.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Dec 17, 2020 9:30 pm

Those were edgy times, before peace returned.

KDedgytimes1.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Dec 18, 2020 12:01 pm

Which brings up this photo titled "Witless Melvis with Windlace and a Wineglass".
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Sun Dec 20, 2020 7:53 pm

I don't know w hat is happening here.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Dec 20, 2020 10:02 pm

It's the same group, just earlier in the day. They all enjoyed listening
to Spike Jones records.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Dec 21, 2020 1:13 pm

That does look a little like Spike with the Filister grip.
As a child my folks let me play the phonograph. My favorite was "Spike Jones And His City Slickers - The Nutcracker Suite". It had a chunk missing which may have been my fault.
Looking back on it, it may explain a few things.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Tue Dec 22, 2020 8:35 am

From KD days experimenting with steam:
steam truck.JPG
There is no listing on the photo to say if they are hauling moss, mushrooms, or nutmeg.

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Tue Dec 22, 2020 11:18 am

They are probably condolence clippings from the empathy orchard judging from the pile of solicitude husks stacked at the left.
What a pity.
They ran the skidder at 150 lbs. of vacuum at 70 cubic ohms.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Tue Dec 22, 2020 10:41 pm

The only successful method of cubing ohms was developed by KD in 1922.
Interestingly, the reason he perfected it was the difficulty of shipping the
cumbersome and irregularly shaped ohms. By cubing them, it was suddenly
possible to process and ship them en masse to all thirty-two receiving ports.
Ernie Farquardt did a nice write up on it in the January, 1927 edition of Hair
and Organs Monthly.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Kaiser » Wed Dec 23, 2020 5:21 am

Well, that truck being a steamer we can rule out that it is hauling a## :lol:
When in trouble, do not fear, blame the second engineer ! 8-)
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Wed Dec 23, 2020 9:31 am

Burger, I'm missing the January 1927 edition of the Hair and Organ Monthly magazine. Do you have it, or is it on line some where? I'm sure anyone doing research would like to see what else it contains. I think I heard that there might be a cover shot somewhere in the archives.


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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Wed Dec 23, 2020 10:29 am

I asked the same question of Heinrich when I happened across a copy in the
waiting room at Dr. Foontickler's office last Friday. Heinrich believes Bertram
may have mistakenly left it there when he had his appointment with the good
doctor the week before. That being the Archive copy FROM the Institute, which
isn't supposed to leave the 3rd Floor Reading Room. But it does contain some
vexing material, and Heinrich suspects Bertram took it to the appointment and
forgot it there. He is repairing a snow axle drop spindle on the surrey, but expected
to get over to Dr. Foontickler's office as soon as that work was done to verify and
retrieve it.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Wed Dec 23, 2020 10:55 am

I too would like to find even a Xeroxed copy.
One must appreciate the violent resistance ohms have to being cubed. Osmosis was found to be more productive than steam but requires more flux.
OHMZ.jpg
Using a Gatling field coil compresses the neurons to an area that can be determined using a common compass. Then a line can be circumcised between the two. Care must be taken not to have loose clothing that might get pulled into the ratchet.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Wed Dec 23, 2020 11:35 am

Is that the capacity of flux or the flux capacitor?

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Wed Dec 23, 2020 12:45 pm

That is a good question Herb and often asked. Flux has very little capacity. The magnitude and magnetism are proportionate to the hypotenuse of the amplitude squared. Much like squaring ohms without the added vanilla.
If I had that copy of the January, 1927 edition Monthly I'd show you the diagram.
In it's place, this will have to do for now.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Wed Dec 23, 2020 10:24 pm

I think I see a mistake in there. Have you spotted it?


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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Dec 24, 2020 12:13 am

Many think the vex amplifier was a mistake, but in practice, produced the
necessary expansion coefficient readings to form the corners on the cubes.
This is where all others failed and KD succeeded in his design. True to his
nature, he took the opposite tact to conventional thinking and teased out
the bugs until finding success. Many a laugh was had around the tables at
Ernie's when the quiet KD bested the best of minds with his meticulous level
of intuition and tinkering.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by perry kete » Thu Dec 24, 2020 8:38 am

That sure looks the game board for "Mister Marvin's Mystery Mushroom and Moss Mining" marble maze. You had to go out to the barn and punch your own holes in the board with a pitch fork before you could use it. The game board was printed on the broad side of Balinda Butterbottoms brown bake buttered breakfast biscuit batch box and you collected bundles of brown box bottoms to buy beautiful blue Bonnie, Buster, Burt, and Betty game pieces.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:22 am

Perry, Thanks for explaining that.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:49 am

Right you are Perry. The game board idea was appropriated by "Mister Melvin", who finally got approval from KD to use it for the game he invented after several thousand boxes had already been printed. KD consented on condition that the critical magneto condyle flux resistance circuit be eliminated to make it safe for small children, just in case clever young minds put it into play for the intended purpose. Alas, several major explosions took place around the basin in subsequent years. Mister Melvin always was one to go off half cocked.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Thu Dec 24, 2020 1:14 pm

Herb, yes, the same mistake appears in the 1927 version except it is on the reverse side of the liquidizer coils.
Burger is correct, the amplifier mistake was vexing and later re-ambulated. Conrad's article highlights the laughing around the tables culminating in a reflex while laughing that precipitated Happy Sally to spurt from KD's nose. They revived him and as he recovered the inception of quantum twiddling occurred to him. The rest is history.
I will mention, Perry, that we keep the pitch fork handy just for that reason.
Condyle flux Rich? That 1927 Monthly also gives 4 different solutions to magneto clonificance plus the Van Bockel method.
Time for some Egg Nogg.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Thu Dec 24, 2020 11:15 pm

PLUS the Van Bockel method ??? I am shocked ! :o
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Dec 25, 2020 12:32 am

Not much has been mentioned here about the Winter Jamboree that
was begun after the overwhelming popularity of the Regatta left revelers
looking for a winter equivilent. As the stabilization of gravity around
the Chugwater had only occurred several years before, it did not take
long for the area's more creative types to adapt logging sleds into sized
down racers. Felix "Zeppelin" Funkbunkler and Buck Futz dominated the
Calhoun County Grand Prix through the teens and twenties, seen in this
1921 shot as the racers made the final drop from the Upper Terrace to the
finish line at the ferry terminal pier. Cover photo from Hair and Organ
Monthly, December 1921.

KDsled1.jpg
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Dec 25, 2020 11:18 am

It appears gravity hadn't stabilized on the left side of Festoon Wimberly's natty Sedan yet. They had tried to slide jolly boats and skimming gigs down the hill when there was a bit more snow. It was discovered the steering was a problem after a number of picket fences were demolished.
WimberlySdn.jpg
Charlie Fackrell even wore his demolition derby while maneuvering his lumber toboggan down the course.
Buck married one of the Larkvonnet Twins in the 30's.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by perry kete » Fri Dec 25, 2020 11:38 am

The driver was the founder of the "Tippin' T's Club" but the authorities didn't know the tippin' part was not the cars but "Happy Sally" users!
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Dallas Landers » Fri Dec 25, 2020 12:58 pm

Rich, the owner of that T was Ilene knotplumb. This info was found in the Chuwater Daily, janurary 2nd 1921 under propery damage. No charges were filed as the paper was free. The Tippin T's Club was the main sponsor for the downhill run. A pre race tippen was a hit and helped calm nerves.

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Fri Dec 25, 2020 5:04 pm

That makes sense and the 21st was a Friday. Ilene was not always on the level.
Happy "Tippin".
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Fri Dec 25, 2020 5:57 pm

Heinrich just sent a telegram to correct an earlier comment I made. In spite
of the "Monthly" name, Hair and Organs magazine was a weekly publication, not
a monthly. He states that both hair and organs were quite popular at the time
and demand was high. The Chugwater & Northern dispatched unscheduled extras
across the river to bring in additional loads, as they came off the presses.

Even Kalamity Dick had a part, periodically writing submissions about his own
hair and organs.


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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sat Dec 26, 2020 1:13 pm

It's an understandable mistake. The publication was often confused with "Hare & Organs" which was issued bi-monthly or frequently six times a year or so.
HnO.jpg
It was distributed by Chugwater & Northern rabbit transit and arrived a day or two earlier.
The Funkbunkler and Futz article was included it the May-July addition.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sat Dec 26, 2020 1:15 pm

One of KD's many organs.

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Herb Iffrig » Sun Dec 27, 2020 9:30 am

He was well organized.

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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Sun Dec 27, 2020 1:38 pm

Klamity Dick was very organized and did have many organs. He collected the available ones and made trips to service ones like this one owned by Harry Schratcher. His paramount interest was the aged air residing in the bellows. It was rich in argon vapor which he could leach out and transfuse into the waddling tubes of the flackenpoth guilderfluke. Normal air from the atmosphere contains merely a fraction of this compared to the air pumped through an organ absorbing tonal virbroconic flux.
Orgun.jpg
He kept this secret from his guilderfluke competitors for many years but now it can be told.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Sun Dec 27, 2020 5:58 pm

That's a wonderful view of Cuthbert Maddox's corral. KD gifted Cuthbert's hired man Spud Whiffletree with a fine pump organ on the condition that it would be kept and played near the corral, or in the horse barn during inclement weather. That's spade's wife Demelza and their kids in the photo. Demelza was an accomplished musician, and practiced diligently on the pump organ KD peovided. She played for church services every Sunday all over the basin. In those days folks relied on the Rev. Wesley Gooch, a circuit riding preacher, for spiritual enlightenment. KD had a slightly ulterior motive for this largesse; it seems the bellows air was especially rich in argon vapor when an organ was played in proximity to concentrations of horse manure.

In later years, with the passing of horses for motive power, the reduced concentrations of argon vapor contributed to decreased efficiency from the flackerpoth guilderfluke, encouraging replacement by less elegant, but faster processes. So passed an interesting and romantic era in the early century.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Burger in Spokane » Sun Dec 27, 2020 8:19 pm

Amazing to think of all the things that transpired since Ferdinand Flackenpoth
first landed on the shores of Lake Chugwater.

Doubtful that he could have ever dreamed that rail mounted gilderflukes would
be invented, let alone just a normal thing, as seen here at the Farkle crane, behind
the Vestibule factory. Hans Christian Dandruff's son was head crane operator for
many years.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Eagle » Mon Dec 28, 2020 11:28 am

Designed by Cliff Dwellinger and constructed out of alloy craneium those derricks were crucial to lifting those heavy anglotechnical contrivances. As Gusthalinkigton, wearing the Riggman's hat, wrote "We liffted lots of burdenson macHeinery but the Dwellinger jib makes it slicker than naval mucus!"
Note the twin crossbar on the phlemn.
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Re: OT - Adventures of Kalamity Dick - Fact or Fiction?

Post by Rich Bingham » Mon Dec 28, 2020 2:49 pm

Interesting aside, Cliff's brother John slipped on a banana peel outside the Biogram Theater one summer evening in 1935 and broke his sterno. Wanted for multiple parking tickets he was attempting to avoid Officer Quincy Caltrop at the time, but the constable had him dead to rights.

More pertinent trivia: navel mucus is a rare condition that occasionally affected crane operators. In later years, allergists have pointed to alloy craneium.
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